I'm sorry for thinking that you should be different. I'm sorry for letting others CONVINCE me that you should be different.
I'm sorry that I shamed you for not being brilliantly open, unconditionally loving, and wholeheartedly giving.
IT IS OK THAT YOU HAVE A WALL SURROUNDING YOU.
I now understand that this wall was created to protect me at some point, likely MANY points, in my life.
For this, I am deeply grateful. I honour you for loving me SO much that you shut down your DEEP desire for connection and expansion... just to keep me safe. This is the most loving thing ANYONE has ever done for me.
You have blessed me with many opportunities to witness and experience you WIDE open, and HOLY MAMA is it GLORIOUS!
I am grateful for these times of deep connection with you, and I'm sorry that I have pushed you and blamed you and shamed you for not being that way always.
I trust you.
I trust your wisdom.
I trust that you have more wisdom than my tiny logical mind can even fathom.
So please, take your time in this unfolding. I will be patient. I will continue to support and nurture you, and I promise to not be pushy and demanding. And I most definitely will NOT let others be pushy and demanding with you either.
You have so lovingly taken care of me all these years. I now commit to taking care of you. Because we are in this together. I understand this now.
Oh, and when you ARE ready to open fully and shine brightly as you do, I will be right here, opening and shining along with you.
Until then, and always, I love you.
I belong to you.
You belong to me.
You are my SWEET heart.
Love Letters to Self